12/30/17 My thoughts on temple marriage

(written late December, sent March 6, 2018)
I wrote this after seeing you two at Dillon's wedding but have hesitated to send it.  I feel strongly about this but don't want to make you uncomfortable or unhappy with me.  So please read this and take it as you will and I'm not trying to be pushy or anything. I just love you guys.  Thanks for being good parents and loving me! Love you!!!

    “If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently. you shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don’t expose it to the elements. You don’t make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by.” –F. Burton Howard

*****     It was so good to see you guys this weekend and spend some time with you. It also gave me some time to think about both of you.  I never understood why you didn't get sealed in the temple when you originally got married and I don't understand why you haven't done it now but I wanted to tell you both how I feel about temple marriage and you getting sealed to one another.

    I personally made the commitment when I was 19 years old to be sealed to my sweetheart for time and all eternity.  I was apprehensive to get married at such a young age but I knew that I loved Andy and that he loved me.  Heavenly Father has been with us as we have "grown up" together.  He has helped us when we were happy. He has helped us when we struggled.  He has guided us when we weren't sure which direction to go.  He has been there as we brought babies into our lives. He helped us to know we needed to have our beautiful caboose girls in our lives. He has helped as we struggled with illness. He continues to help us with our callings and our jobs and our lives.  We made a commitment to each other to be together forever and so we have extra incentive to make things work and we have extra help. It is so comforting.

     I can't speak for Becky and Ruth but I would be happy to include Suzanne in our family for time and all eternity.  Suzanne is a very loving and giving and sweet lady.  It is very difficult to step into another family and take the place of a beloved wife, mother and grandmother but she has stepped up and willingly tried to step in and she has done a beautiful job.  I don't think there is any doubt that she cares about and loves you and all of us. 

     I also can't speak for Mom.  I know that Andy and I have discussed this topic many times in our own relationship.  Would he take another wife if I died? Would I take another husband? It is very difficult to imagine either of us with another person.  However we have agreed that if one of us was to die and leave the other with many years to live we would want the other person to be happy.  The marriage relationship is established by God to help us be happy.  So we agreed that if one of us were to die the other should try to find someone to spend the remaining years with.  I truly believe that mom would also love Suzanne and that things will work out. 

     I am not sure what is preventing you both from moving forward but I would like to say a couple things concerning that. You have already committed to spend the rest of your earthly lives together.  You have come together and worked hard to make things work. As with any relationship I'm sure you have struggles. The temple marriage helps you with those struggles.  Your relationship expands to include God.  So when things get tough you can turn to him and he will help you both. Take the time to explore what is holding you both back.  Make a list if you need to and work on things.  Be humble and go before the Lord and make the commitment and he will help you to resolve your problems.  

     I believe that your Father in Heaven wants you to make that commitment to one another and then to spend the rest of your lives honoring that commitment.  It is truly a beautiful thing to love and be loved by your sweetheart.  Don't wait until things are "perfect" to be sealed because they never will be.  We are not ever going to be perfect on this earth.  Make the commitment and set a date not too far off in the future and you will be blessed. 

     You are both so lucky to have one another to go through your golden years with.  You have been blessed with the gospel in your lives, health, wealth and a good family.  I know that taking the next step of being sealed for time and all eternity with bless you both and your families very much.  You will be setting an example to your children and grandchildren.  You will feel greater commitment to one another.  You will have a common goal to work toward with commitment to your Father in Heaven.  I truly believe the sealing gives you the guidance and protection needed to weather the world. 

     I am so thankful for my temple marriage and the love that I share with Andy. We are truly blessed to have one another.  I am married to my best friend and we work daily to continue that partnership. 

    On a final note - "The covenant of eternal marriage is also essential for exaltation. Exaltation is eternal life—the kind of life God lives. He is perfect. He lives in great glory. He possesses all knowledge, all power, and all wisdom. He is kind, compassionate, and merciful. He is the Heavenly Father of every person on earth. We can someday become like our Heavenly Father. This is exaltation.

Exaltation is the greatest gift that Heavenly Father can give His children (D&C 14:7). It is the reward of all those who prove faithful to the Lord. Those who do will live in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom of heaven."   

     Suzanne needs to enter into this covenant in order to return to Heavenly Father in the celestial kingdom.  She can't do it alone.  I am sure that this is something that weighs on her mind as her testimony grows.  You have the power to give her that gift if she will accept it. 

     I am so thankful for my temple marriage and the love that I share with Andy. We are truly blessed to have one another.  I am married to my best friend and we work daily to continue that partnership.  I hope and pray that you will consider entering the house of the lord together and forming that everlasting covenant and then spending all your remaining days unselfishly serving and loving one another and the Lord. 

     We love you very much and want you to be happy now and always.  I really believe making this extra commitment is part of the recipe for a happy life. I hope you will consider what I've said and know that this comes from me but it also comes from our father in heaven.  He wants you to be happy and return to him. 

    Love you both and only want the best for you!

*****

     “My husband has made me laugh, wiped my tears, hugged me tight, watched me succeed, seen me fail, kept me strong. My husband is a promise from our Heavenly Father that I will have a best friend forever.” –Unknown